meet me in tahiti

With the weather becoming a bit too february, and fueled by the series premiere of Lost, I had no choice but to jet out of the country. Tahiti just sounded ideal, and there's nothing cuter than that lil Tahiti passport stamp!

With a 16-hour flight dawning on us, my friend mike and i did what any other gay-ass fucker would do, and you can totally see the vicodin in our eyes. Oh, major shout out to Air Tahiti Nui for those business class seats.

Upon arrival, I drank a beer and got le'id, so i'm a bigger slut than mike.

We checked in at Hotel Bora Bora, an Aman resort that was the first hotel to set up camp in Bora Bora (which means "first born" so it was the first in French Polynesia to erupt some 7 million years ago). I loved how it embraced the old-school Tahitian aesthetics with thatch-roof villas, no tvs, and everyone walking barefoot!


Our private villa had a sundeck with this pool that had an awesome view of the beach...

and this guy...


nuh-uh. don't get too comfortable fatty, it's time to cruise.

cutie french boy benoit served us our $80 lunch (two hamburgers and an evian, NO fucking lie. Oh, i'm sorry. did i not tell you how FUCKING EXPENSIVE IT IS HERE??)

But, whatever.... it's Ta-fucking-hiti.
jet lag ensued, kicked our butts, but we did manage to catch the sublime sunset.

in the morning, there was nothing like starting your day with feeding hungry-ass sting rays!

woah. back the fuck up, bitch...

but seriously, they were like lil' puppy dogs that just wanted affection.

but this shark was all like, "I'm gonna have me some asian food." So i got out.

Good thing I wasn't eaten...i would have never seen this hot native hit some balls...

or see a headless Mike...

but whether we get eaten by sharks or lose our heads, it's good to know that tahitians still have a sense of humor..


stay tuned for part two...