happy 100th, brooklyn bridge !

and to j-dogg-26, who i took on this cute lil cruise thing around the manhattan island..


nora (left) is all like, "you aint 26, fool .."


stat of libs.


the girl on the left is one of those girls who talks on those cab tvs.


celebrating the BB's bd in style!

mexican road trip !

goodbye gorgeous resort...

goodbye cute staff...

goodbye senior frog's (LONG story)

and hellllo road trip! sam rented an attitude cause he's got it and we vroomed our way to chichen itza !

of course we had a little detour to the beaches of tulum.

what a road trip it has been ! we picked up cute french hitchhikers...

did some shopping...

and wound up at one of the world's most famous historic sites!

it was pretty fucking hot today...

but our guide's enyclopedic knowledge helped us trudge through the heat...

the observatory (thanks, mayan calendar, for ending 2012!)

sam got a little weird...

but what can you expect over a full-moon weekend? see yall soon !

sunburnt sammy in cozumel

i love mexico, and i love tequila. so i couldn't turn down an assignment reviewing the brand-new lifestyle boutique, all-inclusive Aura Cozumel resort. They gave me a 2-bedroom corner suite with wrap-around balcony. I dunno why.


Maybe they knew Sam was coming to meet me for the weekend, inevitably (and not surprisingly) eating all my food.

and being cool.

Sam spent a few days in Tulum before he came out, obviously affected by the Mayan Gods as he wouldn't stop doing this weird arm dance.

But he did tone it down once we discovered the gym on the rooftop terrace.

I, on the other hand, was distracted by the open bar and jacuzzi with awesome views of the sea.

yum

we cruised the very few hot boys (oh, i'm sorry, left hand side)...


but there really wasn't anything as special as waking up in the morning and having a tall, refreshing glass of homo milk.

our snorkel driver agreed. homo milk and mullets rule.

sam was fond of swimming with the wonderful barracuda and colorful reefs..

i had my own agenda.

hong kong part 2: eat much?

so i decided to take this private dim sum class with a master chef.

we made dumplings (are you sure you know which dumplings (on right) are his and which are mine? look closer.

oh! before i get into the dead animals, i went to this gay bar where they had SVEDKA specials. who woulda thunk?

ok, so who wants duck?

and who ordered the suckling pig?

dead skinned baby pigeon anyone?

or perhaps a cage full of frogs?

surely you won't turn down the dead hanging chicken.

that's right. nothing deserves a finger wag like dead animals.

what made me feel better (not that i'm vegetarian or anything, surprise surprise) was the lightshow while drinking champagne on the rooftop of the presidential suite.

take me to nobu and... what dead animals?

its all about posing with the pose worthy food.

hong kong-ye west

well, hong kong has nothing to do with kanye west, i don't know if he's even been here, but i do know that i'm so lonely ! not really, but it would have been great if you came along! it's rare that a hotel brings a journalist over from the states here, everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, knows my name and my itinerary. its kinda Stepford. nevertheless..




I'm staying at the Intercontinental, one of the top-rated hotels in the world. they put me in an executive suite (i dunno why) with ridic views of victoria harbor.


buuut, i had to change rooms cause i felt so isolated and needed to be closer to the people downstairs! (and—coincidentally enough!—i moved to the same floor as the spa).



damn bitch, get outta my shot!
(anyway, this is at that taoist temple where i had my fortune told which basically said that i run away from my problems. fucking chinese people. this is why i look horrified)


but i felt better after some yum yum dim sum.


these koy fish are getting a little too much steroids.


snake with your hennessey, anyone?


look! there's a white person all the way in the back.


i spent a little too much time on the pool terrace in the awesome heated pool with underwater music, and the infinity jacuzzi looking over the harbor. who woulda thunk this existed in hong kong?


alain ducasse's spoon restaurant was wicked awesome, and these patrons could hear me getting fatter by the minute.


funny thing is... i'm not actually working!